Hey dusty old blog. Sorry for the long ignore but I'm still trying to find my way back up onto my feet and into productive life again. I've made good progress, you'll be happy to know! I made it through the first year without my mom. That first anniversary painfully passed but now I feel like I'm gaining some momentum. I made it through the whole church situation, the betrayal, the misunderstandings, the real pain of all that and came out the other side in a new church home that has embraced us and ministered to us through a lot of crap. They are good people. Hands and feet of Christ people. The Lord pulled us out of a mess and put us in this place at exactly the right moment. Isn't it amazing how He does that?
I'm still struggling with homeschooling. I hate it. I think it represents something bad/painful/evil to me for several different reasons, rightly or wrongly. I have been working through why I feel this way and I've gained a lot of understanding but some decisions have been made and others I'm still working on. What I do know is that I'm going to phase out of homeschooling and into private schooling. Not quite sure how that's going to look yet. Details are yet to be determined.
I joined a fitness challenge in January at the encouragement of my sister-in-law and I'm SO glad I did. I think I've mentioned this before but the last four years have been really bad for my health. I gained 40 pounds and was under tremendous long-term stress which took a toll on my physically. Time to get back to the fit healthy person buried under a few tubs of lard. I'm also converting my schoolroom to a home gym. I know, right? Maybe this is what a mid-life crisis feels like.
One thing is for sure. I'm finally happy again. The Lord has been so gentle and faithful. He took me through a severe series of trials that all providentially happened right on top of each other. But He taught me an enormous amount about my own sin, narrowmindedness, judgmental attitude, and ignorance. Ouch. Those lessons are some of the most painful but also some of the most important. I feel like a chapter has closed and a new one is opening. It's going to be a good one. Very different from the life I've been living, but better and more joyful and with a clearer perspective. And I'll talk about it more because I think I'm getting my voice back.
